The highs and lows of an internship

Bil Paul at the PaloAltoDailyNews has spoken where many interns suffer in silence. His opinion piece gets a 7.5 on a scale of 10.

You can read “The highs and lows of an internship” here.

I wrote a long (too long!) email to him in response. Here are the crucial lessons for any internee from my experience of two internships, two continents and ten years apart.

• You sign an agreement on the first day which basically translates to ‘You are so NOT welcome so DO NOT cultivate any strong affiliations, feelings or communication with this organization’.
• You are not ‘the team’. You will be ignored by staff unless you find yourself babbling with excitement. Become a sponge is my humble advice.
• The desk you get is usually closest to the door–in case the boss needs to press the emergency eject button.
• If you overhear something that you know more about than the boss or team members, the best thing to do is SHUT UP.
• You don’t wish it but you MUST answer the phone. If, God forbid, you answer a few notches poorly compared to the office manager (no less), you will be rebuked loudly for it. In fact, this is true for all kinds of feedback (read below).
• Negative feedback is never communicated in private. The entire office needs to hear it in Dolby Surround Sound.
• You will find yourself sitting for hours at a stretch without anything to do. Always carry a book.
• You will be left out of office parties. Whether its your first week at work or the 12th, you will never be invited to farewell lunches or Christmas parties because you don’t deserve that kind of recognition. Don’t take it to heart. You’re a sponge remember?
• Never tell people you meet on professional assignments that you are an Intern. They will visibly flinch or arrogantly turn the cheek on you.
• The only way to survive is sing ‘I Will Survive’ twice in the morning and evening.

SimplyHired.com: A shortcut at last

I dare not say this is the ‘Google’ of all job searching. Its such an overkill to proclaim a new dot-com ‘a Google’.

Moving on, Simplyhired.com is a great vertical search engine which lays bare what dozens of Internet job boards are hiding: opportunities. Tons of them. I love it!

That its a tech company out of Mountain View is a source of pride for me. Hail MV as the hub of all things great! (Except the super load of restaurants cluttering Castro St.)

Having spent two months using it, I can say it can get pretty infuriating when you find the same post appearing on the same location on every single page that a search reveals. For instance, if I type in ‘writer’, I will get 14 pages of results, several of them repetitive. I have been unable to figure out how to stop this. Since I do go through all 14 pages (what’s an unemployed skilled adult to do?), its absolutely frustrating to watch out for the few new one’s hidden between the repeats.

The filter system is interesting. A couple of weeks ago, I could narrow my search down to only eco-friendly companies (if I wish). But I seem to be missing this particular feature these days. Comes with the usual package that you can narrow your search by location.

After twiddling my thumbs in fear (of being spammed), I’ve submitted my resume on the website and created a profile. A few hiccups while I did that include:

- The Job Description box needs minimum 200 words. I mean, for a real editor that’s a lot of words. I had to cough nuisance for no reason.

- For now, your resume gets posted to 6 other job boards automatically. I was already on Monster, and the other 5 were no-name places for me. Maybe, other great- sites will see the benefit in tying up with SimplyHired soon (what are you waiting for ‘great-sites’?).

Hopefully, the folks are playing more with ways to trim the repititive results down.

Number of interviews scored to date, after months of resume sending = 1. What’s a gal got to do, honest?

Farewell Ramadan

I have never experienced a Ramadan where I can find time to talk to God. I had time to pray for every one. I did.

7 days before Eid in Pakistan is rush hour 24/7 for shoppers. You can’t stock enough groceries and you can’t stop talking about the upcoming Eid holidays-as if there will be nothing to look forward to afterwards. It happens every year.

7 days before Eid here in the US was a slow motion movie for me that stretched all 30 days. It landed me in depression. Last night, I was searching for reading material on suicide. Google lands you to several help pages for anyone in their right or wrong frame of mind contemplating or researching suicide. It gave a little jolt to not go the extreme. But it didn’t cheer me up. It saved me a little bit so thank you all of you who believe those suicide articles should save a life.

What is it about Eid that I am missing here? I miss the non-stop chatter at home. I miss the excitement of Eid lunch. I have no one to cook for, I have no one to share with and I have no one to take pictures of me in my new Eid clothes. I am a ‘fresh’ South Asian bride who is living a horror of an Eid: doing nothing. Traditionally, a bride should apply henna, wait for bangles my husband would bring for me and serve so much food to guests that they complain about it happily. But we live in the new age where even in Pakistan I some times choose to not wear bangles or apply henna since I would go to work in three days time where I don’t like the unneccessary attention. Out here, since I don’t have work to go to I want to indulge myself. Ironically, I can’t. There is no one here to please. Sigh.

On this last day of Ramadan, I am remorseful about this month of spiritual cleansing, reflection and love for God. It leaves me feeling naked, sinful, hateful and indulgent in life again. For a logical mind, it sounds ridiculous because you could be feeling like Ramadan all year round if you like. But this month comes once a year and this time is special for us. Goodbye Ramadan, you have been kind.

Amanpour @ Stanford University

The Daniel Pearl Foundation initiated several activities following the WSJ journalist’s murder in Pakistan. They contribute to the global community in many special ways and its remarkable that Daniel’s family and friends are pouring their energy in each one of them. It is heartening to see them walk on as they do. As a Pakistani, I feel nothing but shame that we were home to his murder.

 

At Stanford University, Daniel’s alma matter, a new series of Lectures were inaugurated yesterday by the Foundation. Judea and Ruth, Daniel’s amazing parents who are one of the main forces behind the Foundation, introduced the first speaker.

The first speaker was CNN’s Christiane Amanpour who parachutes into war zones to cover conflict. Over an hour, Amanpour had the entire auditorium spellbound. In person, she captivates with her storytelling abilities. Most people found her very candid and upfront. A professional journalist knows that diplomats give the impression of being “opinionated”–as did the lady Amanpour.

What did the evening offer to an auditorium where you’d be lucky to find standing space:

1. news networks = watching profit margins/going commercial/scaling back
2. a 3D view of covering conflict for a news network (including most conflicts Amanpour has covered, even Rwanda–the Achilles heel’s for news media)
3. hailing objectivity as the mantra journalists live by (false! but you shouldn’t say otherwise in front of undergrads)
4. pitching her new series exploring religions at war and why
5. voting for change in the US foriegn policy
6. ending the evening on a positive note after an earnest request by the moderator to do so

Coverage at the Stanford Daily (Lecture honors Daniel Pearl) and the Peninsula Press Club blog (Reporter with Opinions).

So, what do YOU do?

I’m at a loss. For words. To describe. What I do.

Since I can remember, I have been running with time. Time for school. Time for tuition. Time for exam. Time for tests. Time for college. Time for exam. Time for admissions. Time for university. Time for semester exams. Time for internship. Time for work. Time for more work. Time for work. And finally, no time for sleep.

Tick tock tick tock. No break. Never a break. Vacation was always 10 days off to counting down when you’ll be back at work, when you’re running to catch a flight, running to see all the sights, running for a meal and running eventually back home. Back to work.

So now I’m at a loss. Not being able to work. Not being able to run. Not being able to look at the clock thinking its time to get home. Home is where I am always. In mind and body.

Add to this the non-stop emails that come from friends.

‘hey, i know youre relaxing and enjoying and all, but what do you really do??’

’so great that you’re enjoying yourself, what are your professional commitments?’

‘are you really doing nothing or are you working? if so what is it?’

‘really? you don’t do anything? that’s such a disappointment! a person like you, not doing anything, tch tch tch!’

You can let this get to you. You can seeth in anger and resentment. You can boil until it kills you. But you can’t kill yourself over it.

I tell myself I’ve earned this space in time where I have the freedom to read until I sleep. Or sit on the sofa without moving a muscle from morning to eve. Or just full stop. I keep a home. I can’t describe how much time is needed to make sure every thing in a home looks right, works right, tastes right and smells right.

Some one who has parents doing that for them can never know what it is a housewife with no working permit in a new country does. Not even if I explain it. So why bother.

Envy me. Is the best. I can offer.

First @ Recipezaar.com

Hooray! My (mom’s) very, very first recipe got published at Recipezaar.com

When you’re counting the minutes like I do, every recognition counts–as does getting a recipe published on a busy cooking-social networking website like Recipezaar.com. Google opened this wonderful world of cooking to me two months ago, however, the website–a passion of ex-Microsoft employees Gay and Troy–has been around since 1999. I wish nothing but luck and success to you both, who unlike me and my husband, found their unique idea for a start-up.

I rate this website very high, among the many resources I’ve found online. I learnt how to turn the stove on in 2001, thanks to campus life. In between, I just got by mastering the art of making daal. But having a husband means creating more than a passable meal. Recipezaar.com has the best interface, best search engine and best cooks at work! I hope they keep it free for poor people like me.

Other cooking-related web pages in my favorites:

Non-Vegetarian Chinese Recipes
Cook’s Thesaurus
Cooks.com
English names of Indian spices

Jeans

What is it about this fabric that is so vital to our wardrobe yet so hard to find when you go shopping?

I love this segement on Oprah: Denim Dos and Don’ts You will learn what to call all the misshaps that happen to you when you wear the wrong jeans e.g. exposing your hips because the low-rise fad won’t go away or worst, belly bulges on the sides.

I have been on the look out for a place to find jeans that fits me in San Fran. It ain’t easy. No luck so far. And I’ve tried countless pairs from TK Maxx, Kohls to Levis.

Halal passengers?

Where in the Koran does God prohibit you from carrying drags and alcohol-laden passengers?

A segment of Muslim drivers are refusing rides citing their belief. For our Somali-born airport cabbies, it is unIslamic or haram to show support–in the form of offering taxi rides–for people carrying alcohol or offering prostitution.

Ignorance breeds contempt. If our cabbie friends would study the life of Muhammad (PBUH), they would know better than to refuse work. More importantly, you are not impressing anyone in this country with your ‘Islamic’ behaviour. Pick’em and drop’em. You don’t have to lean closer to your passenger to get a whiff of their perfume or, feel tempted to steal their alcohol God forbid!

Local imams and Free Muslim Coalition have disapproved the act, rightly stating this rigidity is uncalled for in America. The Minneapolis Airport authorities showed sensitivity to the cab drivers, color coding cabs who refuse passengers with alcohol. The City government is showing no mercy (thumbs up!) and making it clear this attitude won’t take the cabbies anywhere. Does anyone recall that the foundation of Islam also includes respecting other’s will and tolerating their preferences?

Krispy Kreme’s “Hot” sign

“Has anybody ever eaten just one?” Oprah asks. “I had my irst one [a couple years ago] and I ended up eating four. It’s dangerous!”

Oprah talks a lot about Krispy Kreme–or she used to in the reruns shown in Pakistan. One of the things I wanted most when I landed in the US was a bite of these (Oprah strikes!). I just don’t see it marketed as widely as I expected.

Many phenomenal American exports (McD, BK, KFC, PizzaHut, Subway) that have king-sized outlets in developing countries are puny in their homecountry. So, there will be a McDonald’s in one block but there won’t be three. In major Pakistani cities such as Karachi, you can’t turn the road before running into this monstrosity. Often, KFC and TacoBell are merged in one lemonade counter-sized shop.

I finally spotted my first Krispy Kreme outlet a few weeks later. I had my first taste on October 1st. Out shopping, I missed breaking my fast by an hour. The Krispy Kreme outlet closeby was enticing. A neon sign in the window said “Hot KrispyKreme Now”.

Krispy Kreme roll out their oven fresh doughnuts morning and evening. If you happen to drive by when this sign is up, do not drive on, stop and pick up the hot stuff. I saw the rows and rows of their Original Glazed being baked, crusted and packed off for super stores right there. What’s more, if you’re around when the doughnuts are hot, you get one Original Glazed free, just for being there. I had 3, no kidding! Oh, and definitely better than Dunkin any day.

Sights and sounds

…of the USA make more sense when you find your feet. That takes about a month, at least. Doesn’t matter where you’re coming from, how far you’ve traveled and what your ambitions are. The roads, transport, payments, customer service–the community where you make your home (even a temporary one) takes a while to get used to. Millions have happily adjusted in the land of the free and opportunist. I’m walking.